Category Archives: Hot Air

Contents of the freezer

We’ve been trying to stock up on the contents of the freezer the last few days, since someone turned it off during a hot spell, and destroyed every last pea, ice-lolly and piece of bacon…I was cleaning round the door handles just now when a strange pong seemed to be coming from its direction… “Shitzah!  […]

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Boy died after he was ‘electrocuted’ by table lamp

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Margaret needs to go in a home

Why, because you and Pain-in-the-butt said so.

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Chip on the shoulder

Not that old turnip again.

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How about this…

My aunt and uncle arrive and sit around quaffing wine as if they own the place. Pain-in-the-butt rings shortly after they arrive and has a good hearty chin-wag with them. I am ordered to stop being so noisy when I move a dining chair to sit down in my own home, because my uncle is […]

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NEW HOME SECRETARY

A bully with no respect for anyone Always right and never in the wrong Able to put you away at a moment’s notice Incapable of making a mistake or ever admitting they were wrong Superb at manipulating others and twisting the facts Able to change the law at a moment’s notice Enthusiastic about more surveillance […]

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PRINCE HARRY

The young ginger ran up behind his older brother and kicked hard into his heels. William turned with a look of panic and pain… “Why can’t I be King?” blurted Harry. We both had the same father.  

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A warning to us all

I was persuaded by an Asian sounding gentleman calling himself ‘John’ that he was a Microsoft Engineer and that my computer had been hacked.  He said he needed to remove some malware which had got into the  hard-drive. He then asked for access to my computer and asked me to load a programme called ‘Any-desk.’  […]

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Graham Taffy Mackerel

Was fined over six thousand pounds today for failing to have enough turn-stiles open at Hillsborough thirty years ago. It did not directly cause any deaths but made the Judge very popular with his audience. Comments overheard: should have been sacked immediately was a burden to society rat in the cornfield solid as a rock […]

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I said to Charles…

We were finishing our chess session with a chat about politics on Saturday. I turned to Charles, who was brought up in a very well to do area of Surrey. “Have you ever wanted to be black Charles?” He said he didn’t much mind whether he played black, or white.

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The birth of Danny Baker

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Tony Slattery’s gone insane…

“Lost the plot!” That’s putting it mildly.

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I like this new UKIP leader

Defended Tommy Robinson and other demonized scape-goats against the lies told about them in the media and by the Establishment…

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Sally handed me a pencil

Sally handed me a pencil for notation at the chess group this morning. “I hope you don’t mind a little one?” she said. I don’t mind how big it is as long as it does its job alright.

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A rubber Johnny

I’m in my sixties and getting on a bit. Called in the local Chemist’s where I know there’s some nice bits of stuff. I’ll have a box of those I said…

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The ‘cap’ of liberty

During the French revolution a red ‘cap-of-liberty’ was placed atop each statue in the town square.  It symbolized the triumph of the common people over the aristocrats and the sponging oppressive royal ass-holes. It was hung on trees too, to remind everyone that dictatorship would not be tolerated in any shape or form. The wearing […]

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Polyps in your butt can lead to a serious degeneration in your physical health

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Scientists say pig’s brains can be restored to normal levels of ignorance

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Peter and Mimi

I met Peter and Mimi on the path. Thought I would test their reaction: what do you think of people who tell lies.. who just use other people for what they can get, who go behind your back, who think its funny when they get you into trouble… who even get leech Brenda to do […]

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Bright Spark

Best live band I have heard in years…Bostik was busy doing his puzzles the whole time in preparation for Heather’s break. I thought Hannah was nice. She smiled a lot. Mortimer looked like an old turtle. What really made my night (apart from wearing my stars and strips hat) was the eighteen year old pool […]

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Face-book censorship

I had the pleasure of hearing Nick Griffin on Question time some years ago. In spite of constant heckling from members of the panel and sniping from the audience he came across as the only reasonable person in the room. Every time he tried to speak morons attempted to interrupt him or twist what he […]

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The BBC’s deliberate distortion of the facts

Your left wing campaign against Donald Trump will go on forever, no matter what anyone says.  Your reporters are still rushing to wipe Hilary’s backside!

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I’m Mike!

Dear Readers,  I’d just like to say something about Mark Goodman, a retired Head-teacher from the local Quacker school, who is about to embark on a dangerous mission to the Middle East.  Mark is going to be endangering himself in the hot sun for three scorching months, monitoring the Jews and escorting Palestinian children to […]

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The banning of Internet porn

I wonder, just what percentage of people watch, or have seen, Internet porn?  Probably a lot more than would ever admit it. For our own good the Government are bringing in yet more laws for our safety and personal benefit. It may corrupt the young.  Someone of a slightly nervous disposition might get their hands […]

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The whim of an English land-lord

In the mid nineteenth century, when the slave trade was at its height, members of the ruling class could do whatever they liked with their property, including the administering of corporal punishment.  Slave girls could be taken to the nearest prison to receive their punishment from the professional executioner, who was paid a fee by […]

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The burning of Notre Dame

I watched President Macron walking through Paris today. He didn’t appear to be smiling. If it was one of the yellow-vests I doubt if we will ever get to know.

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Dear Divine Construction

‘Thank you for all the difficulties you’ve given me, for all the problems I’ve had to overcome, which have given me strength and the power of reason’

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The end of poverty, racism and discrimination!

No kidding…

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A long history

Spoke to a professional in town today. No names! Wouldn’t want Creep Ward to go round telling tales again. She told me how shocked she was to hear ‘the Little Shitzah’ speak to me. “I was sorry for you,” she said. “She spoke to everyone else completely differently. Sue is one of the nicest kindest […]

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Wicked leaks founder vacates winter residence

Dragged to a waiting car by bullies-with-badges.

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