Author Archives: Godfrey Winklebacker

Peabody said this…

I don’t know if agent Peabody is familiar to any of you, but if he’s not, just to fill you in: he’s been my stool pigeon for the last few years down at HQ, where he says the boys upstairs are very sick bastards indeed. According to Peabody, at least, a lot of them are […]

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Well done mom!

You hid the laundry basket in the only place I didn’t think to look; the shower cubicle.

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Further gaslighting

“You, are a maniac! “No I’m not!” The guy lit a fag and glanced at me. “How do you know whether its just in your brain?” “Are you trying to undermine my self confidence, or something…” “You are dangerous!” “That’s what you think.” “We value all our differences…” “We are all just as good as […]

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Aren’t people wonderful 2

Violence is wrong Displays of aggression are morally repugnant Power is wrong Lying can get you into serious hot water Anger is the spawn of the devil

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Schools: funding down

Due to a short fall some Education Authorities are having to cut back on school hours, shocking though it may seem. We may even see a four-and-a-half day week. I heard one girl cry; “We love school! We want our day back!”

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Set the house on fire

Pain-in-the-butt Came back from the group to find all the electrical devices on and smoke filling the kitchen. The Little Shitzah was no-where to be seen, but I did hear some singing coming from the garden: “Who’s mummy’s little girl…”

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They whisper in corners…

I saw mom and Kevin whispering in the garden. He advised her to shove all her spare savings from her Santander account into his. Mom has been wanting to go to Roy’s for days, but when the good step-son had gone she started her antics again; “Where is my handbag. What have you done with […]

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Aylsham town centre

I noticed one of the pigs stood outside the bank in the Market place this week, just as the kids were pouring out of school. Its busy at that time, and quite noisy. He was stood against the wall watching everyone, so I cycled up alongside. “Seen any you fancy yet?” I asked him.

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The right to manipulate the public

Politicians are saying its wrong for companies to try and influence voters on-line, yet they do it all the time.

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Nancy Pelosi slurred speech slur

I can never understand a word she says anyhow.

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Tony Slattery’s gone insane…

“Lost the plot!” That’s putting it mildly.

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Peter and Mimi

I met Peter and Mimi on the path. Thought I would test their reaction: what do you think of people who tell lies.. who just use other people for what they can get, who go behind your back, who think its funny when they get you into trouble… who even get leech Brenda to do […]

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Bright Spark

Best live band I have heard in years…Bostik was busy doing his puzzles the whole time in preparation for Heather’s break. I thought Hannah was nice. She smiled a lot. Mortimer looked like an old turtle. What really made my night (apart from wearing my stars and strips hat) was the eighteen year old pool […]

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Face-book censorship

I had the pleasure of hearing Nick Griffin on Question time some years ago. In spite of constant heckling from members of the panel and sniping from the audience he came across as the only reasonable person in the room. Every time he tried to speak morons attempted to interrupt him or twist what he […]

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The burning of Notre Dame

I watched President Macron walking through Paris today. He didn’t appear to be smiling. If it was one of the yellow-vests I doubt if we will ever get to know.

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Dear Divine Construction

‘Thank you for all the difficulties you’ve given me, for all the problems I’ve had to overcome, which have given me strength and the power of reason’

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The end of poverty, racism and discrimination!

No kidding…

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A long history

Spoke to a professional in town today. No names! Wouldn’t want Creep Ward to go round telling tales again. She told me how shocked she was to hear ‘the Little Shitzah’ speak to me. “I was sorry for you,” she said. “She spoke to everyone else completely differently. Sue is one of the nicest kindest […]

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Toxic Tommy Robinson

Tommy Robinson was labelled as an activist and a troublemaker because he fought back against the take-over of our country by members of Islam and had a fight with an off-duty Copper who was on the receiving end for once. Am I right, or am I wrong? No doubt pressure was put on Face-book to […]

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GENEVIEVE

Has found herself another mug.

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Eton toffs say…

Mogg must abide by his toffee-nosed up-bringing!

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Pope Gregory the Seventh

Stated, that: The Roman Catholic church was founded by God alone That only the Pope must be obeyed throughout Christendom That only the Pope can depose or reinstate Bishops That only he can use the Papal logo That Princes should only ever kneel and kiss ‘his’ feet That only the Pontiff could depose Emperors and […]

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DEMOCRATS

Not happy with the result.

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The Whittlesford Chess Championship

Some of you will be wondering why I came back from the championship with only half a point. Well, my first match was only my second competitive game. I played a game against the St.John’s Captain but narrowly lost the day before. I was worried whether my health would allow me to travel all that […]

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Rare trees stolen

A couple who had their rare trees stolen pleaded with thieves: “please water our children”

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Thief Vicar

I saw something today, out of the corner of my eye, which I never thought I would ever see. I was hiding on the floor in between the pews when the Vicar came into the church from the Presbytery. He looked hawkishly around, and then he went up to the food-bank near the door with […]

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Fantastic new law of ‘voyeurism’

After thousands of years a new law has been added to the statute book, to go with: stealing your girlfriend’s underwear looking through a window having a premature ejaculation keeping a note-book standing on a ladder sneaking into a bedroom gas-lighting having a fag gross indecency wearing a mac remaining silent climbing up a drain-pipe […]

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Sir Philip Green, martyr

Accused by self-seeking career-minded botox-lipped former-staff of assaulting them, by putting his arm around their shoulders, or commenting on their figure, Sir Philip Green is once again attempting to stand his ground against the tossers in the Establishment, aiming to get him. I blame this on him being short, fat and balding. Certainly not the […]

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Alex Salmond: I don’t believe any of it

Having fought off serious accusations of inappropriate sexaul behaviour earlier last year and having been awarded compensation for the suffering and pain he went through, not to mention the destruction of his reputation, his life, and his history as First Minister of Scotland, Mr Salmond is back in Court, charged with a catalogue of similar […]

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Egyptian statue

An Egyptian statue sold to a private buyer in America for sixteen million will never be seen in Great Britain again. Northampton council will receive eight of the sixteen million, while Lord Northampton will get SIX MILLION of the rest, for being a jolly good egg and having a bloody great mansion.

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