Author Archives: Godfrey Winklebacker

Revised version

PUTTING ON EMILY’S SHOES In the morning, when you rub your eyes, the door opens, and mummy calls… “Hurry, or we’ll be late!” Our jeep lies purring in the driveway. You sit above me on the stairs, Your brown hair, straight down your sides, You look at me, without a whisper, Waiting for something, eating […]

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Methinks I must protest

Hi Janet, I understand what you mean about letting mum move the furniture round every day. It doesn’t hurt anyone, although it can get a bit exasperating. She often leaves things all over the floor which she could trip-up on, and she sometimes spills things which leave a sticky mess. My mum always liked to […]

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Normal on the phone

Shite-in-the-butt was normal on the phone when she rang during mum’s birthday party! TODAY “I don’t want to hear a single word ‘that’ repugnant creature moaning in the background has to say…” AND “Keep taking the tablets…!” Do you mean the ones you were on?

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Brighter than the day

There is a time, when we must rise, From darkness, pain and wrath, When we are stumbling on our knees, And black is but the cloth. When children pray, And old men say, That life is just too bad… Should I eclipse the Sun and Moon, The stars by which we live, Should I be […]

Posted in First Contact, Hot Air | Comments closed

Trump supporters shot, trying to defend Democracy

Do you trust the Democrats?

Posted in First Contact, Hot Air | Comments closed

Wrong sis?

And a Happy New Year to you too! You make me smile. haha! What’s matter. Can’t you sleep? Not so far. I have an idea I can help. ? Think of something very large. Like What? Think of something very hard. What is it? It’s cold outside. Why don’t you try sucking on your fingers […]

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Brave Melania gives hope a boost

How proud he must have been…!

Posted in Hot Air | Comments closed

Red devil given suspended sentence; pigs refused to take bribes

Well, it worked before!

Posted in Hot Air | Comments closed

Ghislaine Maxwell

Throw enough mud, and hope some of it will stick.

Posted in Hot Air | Comments closed

Michael Jackson gave money to strangers

Always said he was kind.

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Comings and goings

Its a pity a parent can’t drive hundreds of miles across country to protect their children without the press hounding them to death because they broke the restrictions, but if your name is Dominic Cummings, then this will continue until they have you out of your job, they hope. You can tell the rabble the […]

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Asked to take it down

I was asked to take my profile picture of Adolf Hitler down, prior to our chess match with the Berlin Bishops. The manager of my team thought it might get me kicked off the site and it would save a lot of hassle, if it upset anyone. I suppose it would be no good reminding […]

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Ariana Grande

A ‘victim’ of the Manchester Arena bombing said of its perpetrators today; “I can’t wait to spit on their grave!”

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Bad language

I urged the Little Shitzah to keep her foul tongue quiet, when we came into the garden today; “Just in case Janet is out in hers.”

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The honourable Sir Alex Salmond

Went through agony for two years of his life Suffered insults and spitting in the street Destroyed his family and reputation Accused of numerous sexual assaults Had to listen to a pack of lies and gross exaggeration Political opponents laughing their cocks off Offered bribes to give evidence against him Faith in the Scottish legal […]

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Crime to hit the roof

I would hate to be a citizen of this country if the schools are all closed down.

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Spoke to Roger

Saw little Roger trotting along the High Street today. All his groups abroad have been cancelled. I am still working on his horoscope for the big day. I told him about the dream I had just before coming into town. I had been sat at a table with a lady friend, who was trying to […]

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Of course ‘J’ snitched on me!

Where else did he get the idea of running a library group.

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Lack of transparency

Talking to the Little Shitzah, and Pain-in-the-butt, is like dealing with two moonstruck cowboys, yet it is they who are in charge of running the asylum. I asked the Shitzah if she had read the letter from the Vet, which advised removing Sam’s eye. She said she had changed her mind…? I told her that […]

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Act Centre due to close

Not because of Corona virus, but due to ‘staffing-issues,’ after your recent comment was finked.

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Not enuff blacks learning to swim

due to hydro-phobia…?

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The Battle of Waterloo

Prior to the battle Scot’s Guard, Mathew Clay, was ordered by his commanding officer to ‘kill-a-pig,’ so that the men could fill their bellies full of pork. A lot of the meat they ate was raw but it was better than starving, someone said. We can only add, that it is a matter of duty…!

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“So much culture behind African hair!”

You can grow it as long as you like now.

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What’s always impressed me most about Donald…

Is the number of women he’s supposed to have groped.

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Chinese cop caught chomping on a dog

They’ve been eating them for ages in our country.

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Dirty Cops

As yet another senior figure in politics has to step down due to an ‘inappropriate’ relationship, we wonder who has the right, here at BUNDERCHOOK HQ, to tell us what is appropriate, and inappropriate. Is it the morally desirable snitch, listening down the phone-line, the acceptable Catholic priest, with the choir-boy cavorting on his knee, […]

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Woman accused of racist behaviour…

says: “I’m still married to a black man.”

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American cars driving on the left side of the road

When it should be the right side!

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Sepsis kills one in five

Thank God for that!

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Second impeachment for Trump…

Democrats are fuming with indignation and disgust because the President did not ask the permission of Congress before suddenly removing one of America’s greatest enemies. And thereby take away the element of surprise. Sometimes I think the Clinton’s are working for the Arabs.

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